Numbers are integral to our existence, woven into every aspect of our daily lives and the foundation of everything we do. We rely on them for every aspect or activity of our lives—to track time, understand calendars, plan travel, count money, compose music, measure ingredients/cook food, know our age, and more! Take a beat and ponder if there is anything that you can do without the use of or a basic understanding of a number, a count, or a measure. 🤔
In education, we can easily sort learners by being language-brained or math-brained, and of course, those geniuses who can process both in the most uncanny way. As for me, team language-brained here! 🙋🏾 While mathematical computation is not my thing, I am incredibly sensitive to patterns–especially when they come in threes. My most recent experience with the magic of three has been re-learning how to crochet. I easily remembered how to make a chain {1 “cord”} and a single crochet {two “cords”} but my muscle memory lapsed at creating that second row. As I retaught my hands to take this transition, I immediately realized that this crocheted pattern was a type of three-stranded cord. It the basic foundation of any crocheted handiwork, meaning if you cannot stitch it, you cannot crochet anything. 🤷🏾♀️
A PATTERN OF THREE
To know me is to know how much I favor the number three, and even more so the idea of the three-stranded cord. Call me crazy, but I happen to believe that numbers–timing and patterns–can be deliberate and divine. While I borrow from Biblical language to convey this concept, it is not limited to it. In various cultures and times throughout human existence, people have noted this special power behind the number three. I am sure you have heard the phrase “three is the magic number” before. Still, I feel compelled to share that the number three and a three-stranded cord are not exactly the same thing, though there is some relation. For starters, the notion of a three-stranded cord conveys more than just a number but also a position, a strength, and more deeply, it reveals a relationship. Though I fancy the number three, I may enjoy the complexities of relationships just a little more. Perhaps that’s why three-stranded cords have me in a chokehold. Altogether, these three ideas—strength, position, relationship—also create emotion; and as human beings tend to do, we assign it meaning and/or symbolism.
I notice threes everywhere but especially when I’m reading or engaged in handiwork. Threes illuminate on the page or in the craft for me and trigger new curiosities that often send me down rabbit holes of study. For this post, I draw from Bible literature because of its popularity. I can assume with a great deal of confidence that you’re familiar. Something about what King Solomon penned thousands of years ago resonates with me.
9 Two are better than one; because they have a good reward for their labour 10 For if they fall, the one will lift up his fellow; but woe to him that is alone when he falleth, and hath not another to lift him up. 11 Again, if two lie together, then they have warmth; but how can one be warm alone? 12 And if a man prevail against him that is alone, two shall withstand him; and a threefold cord is not quickly [easily] broken.
For context, Ecclesiastes 4 is categorized into four main sections: the value of a friend, the vanity of selfish toil, the uselessness of selfish toil, and how popularity passes away. The passage above falls into the first section. Friendship, companionship, partnership are good and highly supporting of our human experience as social beings. Contrary to popular belief, this passage is not discussing marriage, though I see how it could fit into this idea. It more so communicates the idea that life is not to be experienced alone–that the lone wolf type or that loneliness and isolation are not beneficial to us. It also teaches that being alone is not only a sad way to live, but a dangerous way too. Further, it demonstrates the importance of community—not just as a nice to have, but as a necessity—as we work, walk, watch, or warm.
Strength
In ancient times, craftsmen would tie three equal lengths of cord together, a three-strand cord, that served as a measuring tool essential for building. The Hebrew Temple, for example, was constructed like a puzzle without the use of fasteners which required precise measurements. The three-stranded cord was their go-to tool, helping them build things that the entire community could take pride in. It also helped to shape identity and unity as they aimed to fit together like a puzzle, with each part having possession and purpose. Then, what was built represented who your people were. For them, it was also a constant reminder that they were connected to a Higher Power.
Years ago, in learning how to make challah from scratch, an elder once told me that the three ropes of dough were representative of the land, the people, and their Power. I was taught to recite a simple prayer, incorporating these three parts together as one. This memorialized prayer gives honor to the fact that people come from a place and hold a relationship with who they believe to be the divine power behind both. I am not sure where that tradition began but it evokes a similar feel to what I’ve learned about Ecclesiastes 4.
One reason why a cord of three is not easily broken is because when it is braided, the rope comes together and stays together which increases capacity. It reasons that if the foundation is missing or ill-measured, nothing else would be able to make up for it. It would just be off or wrong, essentially too weak or recognizable to build upon. So then, strength, tells of the power of numbers and the value of human interaction.
Position
Another gem from this passage is: though one person may not be able to succeed alone, two can certainly hold their ground, and a third can assume a certain type of position {usually opposition or mediation, depending on the matter.} In many English-translated versions, including the King James Version {KJV}, it is unclear who prevails—whether the attacker overcomes the one being attacked, or vice versa. Other translations suggest that while one person may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. But, the KJV is not specific about who “him” refers to, but in the original Hebrew, it’s clear. The pronoun “him” is linked directly to the verb for prevail, meaning that the attacker is the one overcoming the person under attack. {A different type of pronoun could suggest the opposite.} With this understanding, it could apply physically, as in three actual persons; or culturally, as in what the position of a mediator means to these ancient Hebrew people. {And in this context, even their Higher Power could serve in this opposing or mediating role.} Physically, while one person alone may not be able to stop an attacker, two usually can hold their ground. The Hebrew word for withstand means to take a firm stand. The term for “two” here has a definite article, suggesting a specific person is standing against the attacker. This could also point to a cultural practice where a mediator assumes the position, taking the lawful action necessary to facilitate some kind of peace in a dispute.
A second reason why a cord of three is not easily broken is because when it is braided, the rope comes together and stays together which also evens its distribution. So then, position tells of the power of numbers and the value of peace among human interaction.
Relationship
When three separate strands are braided together, a new cord forms. What happens when we engage in community? Relationships form. What happens when those relationships weather through dispute? They become more locked in, tighter, more secure. Just like the strands, you become woven together. As a result, you gain more support, become more productive, and achieve better results. When you understand this you operate more from a place of collaboration and connection than competition with others, in general. But, we often determine how to relate to others {if at all} by some code of conduct or righteousness that we use to judge or assess or measure. {Not “judge” as is looking down or belittling others, but the kind of judgment you need to make decisions, determine character, and enter into beneficial relationships.} The interesting thing about dwelling together {and later establishing relationships,} be it as friends, companions, partners, or more, is not that we have to think the same but we must operate from a commonplace. Using these ancient Hebrew people as an example, they operated by a code established as The Law, The Torah. Such commonplace creates enough definition to understand what is and is not acceptable while also leaving space for individual expression. It does not matter whether it is a set of family rules, cultural norms, a business contract, a wedding covenant, or legal code, there must be some governance that all parties understand and commit to in some way without it being so uniformed that you cannot tell one person from the next.
A third reason why a cord of three is not easily broken is because when it is braided, the rope comes together and stays together which gives it more support. So then, relationship tells of the power of numbers, the value of peace among human interaction, and the importance of order/code to govern said interaction.
NOT SO EASILY BROKEN
Humans are vulnerable without interaction. But we are stronger with others.
Human beings are vulnerable without protection. But we are stronger with security.
Human beings are vulnerable without connection. But we are stronger with order.
So then, the first strand informs us about socialization while the second informs us about righteousness and the third informs us about responsibility/accountability—such a three-stranded cord is not easily broken.
As you read, I am sure some emotion stirred. Three-stranded cords have a way of doing so.
The power behind the number is three is not limited to this passage; it is an example that reinforces the power of three working together as one. You could apply this same principle to any set of three that can be operationalized as one and find that, it too, is not so easily broken. “Not so easily” does not mean “impossibly” as nothing but death is guaranteed in this life, but why not aim for the most secure foundation?
We grow as we go,
Disclaimer: I chose not to romanticize this passage and assert marriage into it. As mentioned, this passage is not a discussion about marriage itself, but I do see how it can apply. In popular thought, the three-stranded cord, in a marital context, would represent: woman, man, God. I appreciate this symbolism. I think it can work. To avoid the risk of reduction and over-romanticization, I would still encourage a couple to consider how they will design the “house” of their marriage. Who will be its strength/cornerstone? What position{s} can be assumed, especially when under attack? What covenant/contract/code will it enact, and who will it be governed by {as in what/whose authority}?
