Author’s Note: This two-part series began with 3 Common Internal Relationship Threats [Part I], which explored the first three internal threats and how each can disrupt connection when couples do not have structure, language, or awareness to manage them, and is followed by 3 More Common Internal Relationship Threats [Part II], which moves into three […]
3 More Common Internal Relationship Threats Part II Read More »
Author’s Note: This two-part series begins with 3 Common Internal Relationship Threats [Part I], which explores three internal threats and how each can disrupt connection when couples do not have structure, language, or awareness to manage them, and is followed by 3 More Common Internal Relationship Threats [Part II], which will move into three other
Most married couples don’t argue about whether sex matters—they usually argue about frequency and what sex is supposed to feel like. One partner wants intensity. One wants consistency. One craves fireworks; the other craves connection. In reality, a thriving sexual life in marriage depends on two forms of sex: passionate sex and maintenance sex. Both
Sometimes the hardest conversations in a growing relationship aren’t about what is happening, but about what someone is afraid might happen—especially when a couple is preparing to advance into a more serious or “permanent” stage, like engagement or marriage. I once supported a couple who was preparing to move toward engagement. Things were good—steady, affectionate,
Sex Works Differently: Men Need to Empty, Women Need to Feel Full Read More »
“Am I man enough?” That’s the question at the heart of many conversations about marriage among Black men today. We’ve all heard the stories and seen the posts: marriage rates in the Black community are declining, and countless theories about why have been debated in barbershops, living rooms, and online spaces. But rarely do we
Am I Ready for This? Black Men and the Real Talk on Marriage Read More »
At the DC Relationship Education Center, I often hear a common question from Black women: “What makes a man decide to marry?” It’s an important question, especially when we consider how being ready for marriage can positively shape its outcome. Add to that the reality that many marriageable Black men prefer to keep their options
Black Men Speak: What Encourages and Discourages the Decision to Marry Read More »
Imagine sitting down with your girlfriends after a long day of work. You’re swapping dating stories and marriage dreams, and inevitably, someone says, “Girl, I need a man who can handle business, who can protect and provide.” Heads nod in agreement around the table, until one friend asks, “But do men actually protect and provide?”
Are Black Men Still the Protectors and Providers? Let’s Talk Hybrid Masculinity Read More »
When it comes to dating, relationships, and especially marriage, expectations play a big role. But have you ever stopped to ask yourself, “What exactly makes someone marriageable?” If you’re nodding along, you’re definitely not alone. For Black men and women navigating the dating scene, especially with college degrees in hand, this question hits differently. Let’s
What Makes Someone Marriageable? Exploring Expectations Among Educated Black Singles Read More »
Once a relationship progresses to engagement, I begin guiding couples through premarital education, preparation, and planning. This stage is often the most uncomfortable and the most necessary. The romantic love that brought the couple this far doesn’t disappear, but it begins to share space with other, more complex aspects of partnership. Decision-making, finances, routines, family
Love Isn’t Always Enough: Premarital Work That Strengthens Black Marriages Read More »
Many couples pride themselves on being modern, progressive, and equitable. But even the most forward-thinking partnerships can struggle when unspoken assumptions collide with real-life events. Couples don’t have to be traditional to carry traditional scripts. Even in relationships built on shared values, (old) ideas about manhood, womanhood, and work can sneak in. I’ve seen married
Progressive Couples, Traditional Tensions: Finances, Freedom, & Fairness Read More »